an open letter to charlie sheen…


seriously charlie, i think you’re only a year or two older than me.  how is it that your heart hasn’t just stopped?  i know your drug of choice is cocaine.  i’m guessing you aren’t smoking it like i did.  nor shooting it like mackenzie phillips.  you’re snorting it non-stop followed by whatever concoction you ingest to feel “normal.”  what are you drinking along with your xanax?  i’m just curious.  please check “DONOR” on your california liscense and leave your body for science.  this way  we can see just what you put your own body through.

i’m not really mad at you.   i don’t know you.  i don’t  even really know your work as an actor.  sure, i know who you are…but who doesn’t?  you’re the “infamous bad boy of hollywood that gets away with it all.”  you’re the guy that seemingly has sex and love addiction on the brain 24/7.  i’m speaking from my own limited experience with women, porn and crack cocaine.  i lasted all day every day for a year and three months.  and i feel like my lungs and other organs are still healing.  i quit all of it on april 12th 2006 and had to start looking at all the reasons WHY i was tempting death.  has anyone even asked you that?  what’s your rage about charlie?  may i call you chuck?  because it seems you’re chucking your whole life away.  i’m just curious.  i also care as a fellow addict.  hope is real and it’s never too late to plug back into life in a real way.  do it for yourself.  aren’t you sick and tired of being sick and tired yet?  and haven’t you seen every single porno ever made by now?  what’s left on your proverbial bucket list?  you might want to get to whatever you haven’t done yet, because it doesn’t seem like you’re going to make it.

if you do, and i hope you do, you’ll be a HUGE inspiration for the other addicts out there who just can’t seem to stop the vicious cycle.  i wish you well for YOU, first and foremost, secondly for your kids and  then for everyone else who loves you!  from one addict to another, i just felt i had to write something!  here’s to the hardest work on the planet…getting real about the underlying pain that causes addicts to pick up and numb out.  healing is real and it’s possible for EVERYONE!  may we all learn to love ourselves.

peace + love + laughter + healing,    -kathleen.

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